The Summer Solstice (or Winter Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere) is the longest day and shortest night of the year. It’s a time to celebrate the light of consciousness within ourselves and within each other. It is a time to celebrate the triumph of light over darkness, and a return to wholeness in which we, as individuals, become one again with the Whole, the Divine, the Universe, or God.
The last few years have been a journey through the darkness for me. I came to face some shadow aspects of myself. These dark and shameful aspects that I wanted to suppress. Neediness, insecurity, doubt. A wounded child who felt unsafe in the world and so put on a bravado, and pushed through, hiding whatever pain lay beneath instead of facing it. And then I met someone who mirrored me in many ways, someone I loved more than (at that time) I loved myself. This deep, unconditional love healed me as much as it brought up the wounds of the past. From this relationship I learned to let go of the demons that were haunting me. Not to fight them, but to embrace them because they were just wounded, pained aspects of myself. And as I embraced, and brought them into the wholeness of who I am, I healed and became what I always had been – a spiritual being in human form.
Throughout my journey I learned that we are the sum of the stories we tell about ourselves, that beliefs are just thoughts that we keep thinking, and so, what we live and experience as “reality” is merely a reflection of our thoughts, beliefs and stories. What would you be without your story? Who would you be? I began to listen to the stories I was telling myself, and others, about relationships, life, the world around me. Was this really the reality I wanted to live? Were these really the relationships, lifestyles, paths, that I wanted to experience?
Standing at the cross-roads of who I was, and who I could be was unequivocally daunting. You tend to believe sometimes that the Devil you know is better than the Devil you don’t. Living with this painful pattern was familiar. As uncomfortable, lonely, unfulfilling as it was it satisfied others and kept me in a pattern of safety. I could stay in the old, out-dated patterns. I could continue to live a life that didn’t suit me, and blame my past for the person I was, the behaviours I enacted, and the decisions I made. Or I could realise that the wounds we gain are merely wounds, they can heal, and we can live with the scars. We can choose to live with them, and we have to choose to live beyond them, or be limited by them. In the end, the choice is only ours. The only thing more painful than letting go, is holding on to something that no longer suits us.
Taking your own power back, however, can be an uncomfortable prospect. Who then can you blame when things go wrong? What can you do without the safety of old patterns. It’s so easy to slip into the shoes we’ve broken in and which fit our feet, even when the soles have been worn and they no longer provide the support they could. How difficult to break in new shoes, and risk the blisters of learning new patterns, even if doing so will be in our benefit in the long run. It’s much easier to make a mistake when learning something new than repeating an old habit.
The thing is there are no mistakes, there is no right or wrong. There are merely a myriad of paths, and how wonderful they are is up to you. No one can create in your reality but you. No one can know what is right for you, but you. When you are connected to your own Inner Being, your Inner Guidance System, there is nothing that can stop you from living the full, joyful and abundant life you’ve always desired.
Once I discovered this, and began to live it (by changing my thoughts, and beliefs, and the stories I was telling) I watched the world around me transform. The relationships I am attracting into my life are supportive, heartfelt and loving. The work I get to do is fulfilling and joyful and abundant. I get to live and practice my life purpose every day in a way that is deeply satisfying and rewarding.
This is an abundant Universe, and everything is always working out for us. So isn’t it time to let go of the old, out-dated patterns that are no longer working for you?